My Iowa Family

Katie Gwen, February, 2009

This is my niece, Katie Gwen, named so after her Mom, my sister Charlotte Gwen. Katie is my only niece. My late husband, Katie's Uncle Terry, from her early childhood had always called her 'Blond Bombshell'. When he first started calling her that, she was so young she didn't even know what it meant! Katie was the apple of her Uncle Terry's eye.

Katie and Adam

Katie is 12-18 months old

Katie has always had an independent spirit. At the age of 15, she wanted to do a summer missionary trip to El Salvador. She would be there for 30 days with a group of young people she had never met. In order to participate, she took charge of raising her own money to finance the trip. It has been a few years and my brain isn't as good as it once was, but I believe she had to raise $3,000. She did it, but none of us doubted she could or would. Katie did what ever Katie set her mind to do!

She boarded a plane at Memphis International Airport and flew to Atlanta, where she changed planes and continued to Miami. Once in Miami, she met up with the group she would be traveling to El Salvador with. She had never flown and knew nothing about it, but showed absolutely no fear at the prospect. Now, I know part of that is simply the folly of youth. But, I also know Katie, and it was pure faith in the fact that she was doing what she knew the Lord wanted her to do and so, everything would be okay.

Katie at age 16

She was in El Salvador on her 16th birthday. She celebrated with a group of new-found friends and with a sense of accomplishment she had not yet known. It was an experience that settled for her a commitment within herself for her future. She knew she must do something in a mission field. She came home from El Salvador determined to do more missionary work whenever and wherever the Lord provided the opportunity.

Upon graduation from high school, she enrolled in the program from Teen Mania Ministries from Garden Valley, TX. She turned 18 a few days before she left for Garden Valley. While there, she worked with the ministry and participated in activities that grew her up spiritually. She traveled with a Christian band for a month. She spent a month in the outback of Australia on a missionary trip. She worked in the Ministries' Phone Bank making recruiting calls to help finance the missionary trips required of each young person while in the program.

My nephew-by-heart, Brian

It is a co-ed program, but no dating is allowed among the participants. While there, Katie met Brian. They became wonderful friends and Brian took care of Katie. Because he was from Middle Tennessee, they often traveled together on trips back and forth home. During one particular Christmas break, Brian was going to drive Katie's car and they were going to come home for Christmas. A winter storm dropped several inches of snow and ice on the area they were to travel through. What was usually an 8-10 hour trip turned into a nearly 24 hour trip. But Brian got Katie home to us safely and got her back to Texas just as safely.

Brian & Katie, 2004

Brian & Katie, 2008

I traveled to Texas with my sister's family to attend Katie's graduation services from her year's internship with the Ministry. While there, we met Brian and his family and actually met them for breakfast on the morning we were to return home. Immediately, I knew Brian would be Katie's life long mate. You could see it between them when they were together. I made the trip home with no doubt Brian and Katie would end up married at some point in the future. Just as I had known would happen, Brian and Katie were married on June 10, 2000.

My great-niece, Alix Joy (8 yrs. old)

They are so good together and have two wonderful children, Alix Joy and Jaden Isaac. These are the precious souls who have so lovingly taken care of me for the this time I have been in Iowa and will continue to do so until I go home. I cannot express what a blessing these precious loved ones have been to me.

My great-nephew, Jaden Isaac (6 yrs. old)

Although Brian has been unable to be here due to his military responsibilities (he is in Des Moines for training related to his status as an Army Medic in the Iowa National Guard), Katie and the kids have just taken me right in and made me feel like one of their family. I have felt welcome and have made myself at home. I've gotten closer to the kids, which thrills me beyond any word I can think of to describe it!

Brian in Iraq, 2005

The loss of my husband has been so hard, but having this time with my family has made it all so much better. A break from the day-to-day and an opportunity to come to see where they now live and get to know some of their friends and see their community has been wonderful. I pray that someday I am able to give back to them in some way that would express how much this time has meant to me. Somehow, I doubt I ever will.

Katie, Brian, Alix and Jaden---2008

I love you Katie, Brian, Alix and Jaden. You will never, ever know how much I love each of you and how thankful I am for you in my life.

You've Got Mail

I am an introvert, of that I am sure. Being in a crowd makes me nervous, even just among family. I love people, of that I am sure. I never tire of meeting interesting new people and learning about their lives. Those two qualities make for strange bed fellows in an individual. It's hard to love people, yet be an introvert. I suffered through all of my adolescence because of it. I suffered during my young adulthood due to it. I suffered into my adult years at it's mercy. Then, an amazing and wonderful thing happened to me........I found the Internet!

Now, I have friends far and new, old and young. We chat away the hours on our computers passing emails and instant messages back and forth around the world. Nothing gives me more joy than to log on to my laptop each morning and see that epitaph on my screen "You've got mail". I am immediately excited and can't wait to jump in and see who's writing and what they're saying!
Sometimes, it's a nice clean joke or an inspirational video clip. Sometimes it's an alert to a news article of interest to me and a group of my friends. Sometimes it's just junk mail, but I still like to sort through it to see what I've gotten.

Oh what a different life I could have had if I had had the Internet 40 years ago! Do you know children know more about their computers and how to use them than I do? It's true! After spending time with my niece's children, aged 6 and 8, I am fully convinced I will never know what they know about them; they have too much of a head start on me! Why, if I had had this thing when I was 10, I would have been a social butterfly by now! I hear those not in the know all the time complaining that the Internet isolates us. Nothing could be farther from the truth!

I was bred, born and raised in a small rural county in southwestern Tennessee. I've never lived outside the state of Tennessee. I have done some traveling, but that too is limited. Yet, this middle-aged country girl has friends from almost every state in the union, in Canada, Australia, England, Europe, Asia....I'm a globe trotter and I never have to leave the comfort of my living room if I choose not to! Does that sound as if I'm isolated? I think not!

The computer is like every other invention conceived by man. It has potential for great good or for great evil. What it will turn out to be has nothing to do with what it is, it has to do with who uses it and how they use it. It is but a tool for our use. We can do good and edify and encourage others with it or we can do evil and drag others down. It has been the tool of great encouragement in my own life. I have found friends who love me, who love my Lord and who want nothing more than to encourage and pray for each other.

Without my computer, I would most likely have been sitting at home, watching the soaps on daytime TV. If that's what you enjoy, then good for you. It's not my cup of tea. I like people, but I'm an introvert. Thank the Lord for bringing people into my life via the Internet on my laptop!!!

The Search For Normal

Today's post seems so far removed from anything I've felt over the last several days. Last night was so long and so sad and so difficult. And, the worst of it is, I don't know why. Nothing jumps out at me as a reason for why it was suddenly so sad and so hard. Where did all the emotion come from? I honestly have no idea.

We had planned a trip into Bloomington, MN to the Mall of America for Sunday. However, that plan changed when Jaden awoke with a high temperature. He had not been feeling well on Saturday evening, but both Katie and I thought perhaps he was just tired. The temp proved us both wrong. So, we stayed home and just spent a leisurely day lounging at Katie's house.

As the day progressed, I just felt a pale of sadness overtaking me. I had felt this coming on over the last few days and knew a good cry was coming, but I wasn't prepared for the extreme sadness to return with such full force. The day went on as would any other day. I talked with my Dad in TN. I spoke with my mother-in-law, also in TN. I read my emails and visited blog friends. Everything and everyone seemed normal.

I knew, however, that I was not normal. I was walking and talking and laughing as if I were, but I knew I was not. What is it in me that keeps me going? How can I just keep absorbing the blows and going on as though nothing has changed? How can everyone around me keep going as though nothing has changed? Can't they all see that the world is quickly flying apart at the proverbial seams? How can I tell them so they will understand that nothing is ever going to be the same again?

I don't know what tomorrow holds, but then who does? I just know that this journey is not for the faint of heart. I feel like I'm drowning. I can see the light glinting above the water but I can't quite make it to the surface and get my head above the water. My chest feels crushed with the weight of everything that is happening. I feel as though there is no room in there for air, no way to possibly take another breath. And yet, I keep breathing. How does that happen?

I wish I knew the answers to all my questions, but I don't. In fact, there's very little I do know at this particular time in my life. How can I be so absolutely happy on one day and so ultimately sad on the next? Surely this is not a normal state of being? But then, I'm quite sure nothing has been normal for me since the morning I said goodbye to Terry.

This is new territory for me. I don't know if I'm 'normal' or not, but I do know this, whatever I am right now, I don't possess the ability to be anything else at this time. I know the time will come when I will be able to move from this sadness, but that time is not now. Until that time does come, I'll continue to trust the Lord, lean on my family and friends and allow myself to feel the sadness when it comes. I have no power to do otherwise.

Iowa, The Last Day of Week One

Saturday began as a lazy day for us. No one seemed ready to greet the day. Jaden was due to attend a friend's birthday party at the local Art Center from 2-4 p.m. Since he had spent the night at another little friend's house and was going to the party from there, it left us free until time to take the gift and drop it off. Our plan was to have our lunch, drop off the gift and then tour the art exhibitions while he attended his party. Since the girls were all being lazy, our plans changed and we dropped off the gift, went for lunch and then went back to tour the art exhibitions. No harm, no fowl!

We had lunch at a local restaurant, Culvers, which is known for their frozen custard. Alix had her lunch and was ready for her custard immediately. Katie and I, however, decided we would wait until after the Art Center for ours. Alix seemed to bask in the pleasure of having her Mom all to herself for an extended period of time. No little brother to share attention with! She laughed and talked and thoroughly enjoyed her lunch and then her custard. She and I spent several minutes perusing the custard menu to decide what I would have on our return later in the day!

We then left for the Art Center. By name, it is actually known as the Charles H. MacNider Museum and Arts Center. It is housed in a fine old English Tudor Revival style mansion that has been renovated and expanded to a total of 21,300 square feet and owns nearly 1000 pieces of art valued in the millions of dollars. It is located on the banks of the Winnebago River in a beautiful wooded setting, among the handsome Prairie School and Usonian designed homes of the Rock Crest/Rock Glen area of the city. Their exhibits included works of art from all media and styles. They also offer works of art by local and regional artists in the Gift Shop. It is a stop well worth your time if you're ever in Mason City.

After browsing the exhibits for a couple of hours and watching an impromptu puppet show performed by our own Alix and Jaden in the Bill Baird Puppet Exhibit, a visit to the Gift Shop and a quick visit to the 'necessary' rooms, we were off to our next stop.....the local public library. The Children's Area of the library was something to see! So much imagination and creativity coupled with ease of access made for a leisurely visit that Katie and I enjoyed equally as much as did the kids. Their reading room was wonderfully decorated to represent a conservatory and had massive windows overlooking the river. The views were awesome, creating an even more tranquil feel for the children to enjoy.

As we were leaving the library, I spied a large second-story Genealogy Room that was absolutely fabulous! I cannot contain my enthusiasm at the opportunity to spend time there complimenting my research! I plan to drive Katie to work one morning next week and spend the entire day in the Genealogy Room with my Family Tree files, my laptop, a pencil and a fresh pad for all my notes! I know I will make some major discoveries! Their resources are extensive and easily accessible. It may well turn out to be one of my favorite spots in Mason City!

After the library, it was time to scoot back over to Culvers for our frozen custard! I decided on a Mint-Oreo concrete mixer. I opted for the smallest size because I knew I had best not over extend my tummies ability to cope! The custard was so rich and smooth, the cookies were fresh and the mint/chocolate flavors made for a perfect end to a wonderful afternoon. We stopped by the video store on the way home. The kids rented a video game and a couple of movies.

After baths were completed, we snuggled up on the living room sofa with a fresh bowl of popcorn and watched Madagascar II. It was so funny and had such a nice story line. The animation was superb and the voice-overs were captivating. We all laughed till we nearly cried and thoroughly enjoyed the movie! Poor little Jaden was so tired from his sleep-over and birthday party that he didn't quite make it through the full movie. Katie had quite a time getting him up to bed, as he kept trying to go to sleep on the stairs on the way up to his room! It was yet another memory making day.

I am in complete awe at how God has blessed me with this time to rest and heal. Tomorrow begins week two of my visit. Our plans are to drive into Minnesota to visit the Mall of America. I have to say, I'm excited to see it! I've heard so much about it and can't wait to experience it for myself. So, until the next time, remember to love the Lord, accept yourself and appreciate your blessings.

Iowa.....Part III

Wednesday evenings are hockey night for the Eppers household. Jaden is on a youth hockey team and they have their games on Wednesday evening. So, when the kids got home from school, we loaded up and headed for the a local Pizza Hut for pizza and pasta for dinner. The kids had a great time playing in the Play Area while waiting for the food to arrive. We all ate more than we should have and still had to ask for a carry-out box!

Since we had a little spare time on our hands and I needed a few items, we ran across the street to the Big K-Mart. I found a good deal on a pair of lounge pants and shirt and picked up some soda and a birthday card for my nephew. The kids once again wanted and/or needed many things, but I was a good aunt and said "no" this time! The weekend's coming!!!

Having made my purchases, we headed for the hockey arena, which is at the Iowa State Fair Grounds. We made a bee-line for the locker room so we could get Jaden suited up in time to get on the ice and practice before the game. This was no small feat! Once we got him stuffed into his gear, he looked like a robot instead of a little boy! He went directly to the ice rink and started practicing with his friends. We went to the best spot for taking pictures and I snapped a few. Then, we headed for the heated area upstairs. It was cold in there!


I cannot honestly tell you who won the hockey game, as I'm not even sure score was kept! Jaden had a good time and was hungry afterwards (any surprise there?!). So, being the good aunt that I am, we went by the snack bar and got he and Alix a quick snack before loading up for the ride home.


Thursday was an education in rare weather phenomena! We had a winter storm warning, with expectations of ice accumulation followed by snow accumulation. As the ice began to fall, I noticed that I was hearing it thunder. Then, suddenly I noticed what appeared to be lightening. I was quite sure I was wrong as I had never heard of such thing. I was proven wrong when, with the next thunder clap, lightening danced across the sky lighting up the entire area! For the first time in my life, I had witnessed a thunder snow! I had never even heard of a thunder snow, but found it is indeed a rare weather phenomenon. Well, I guess you can teach an old dog new tricks after all!

The kids were due to be dismissed from school at 12:15, so Katie left work early in order to pick them up. They arrived home safely, although cold and wet. Katie gave the drive a good Iowan effort, but decided it was futile as most of the ice was so slushy it just rolled back into the drive sooner than she could shovel it out.


We had made plans to go out on Thursday afternoon, but decided it was best to stay in due to the unpredictability of the weather. Katie made Shepherd's Pie for dinner, which was wonderful, and we spent the evening playing games, watching T.V. and wrangling the kids during bath time. Bedtime came sooner than the kids wanted, but nonetheless, had to go. The house was quiet and the animals and I settled down for some quiet time with the computer before dropping off to sleep.

We had made no specific plans for Friday evening and were just playing it by ear. Around 5 p.m., a young friend of Alix called to invite her to go to the local YMCA for swimming with her and her Mom. Shortly thereafter, one of Jaden's friends called asking if he could come and have a stay over. So, by 5:30 p.m., Katie and I were headed out to drop off Jaden once Alix had gone with her friend.


We dropped Jaden off at his friend's house and then went to Taco Johns for some Tex-Mex for dinner. It was really good food and the dessert was exceptional. I'm not sure what it was called, but it was a sweet bread deep fried and rolled in sugar and cinnamon. It was soooooo good! I only ate 2 small pieces, but could have eaten many more!

We picked our food up at the drive-thru, drove home to eat and just lounge around while the kids were out. Alix came in around 8 p.m. eager to tell us all about her swim time at the "Y" and show us her injured toe. It seems she had rubbed it raw on the pool. Exactly how this happened I'm still not sure of! She settled in with me and Katie and the animals on the sofa and snuggled while she watched T.V. with us. She and Katie both soon fell asleep. They were so sweet lounging there on the sofa and cuddled up with each other! I couldn't resist snapping a few pictures!


They woke around 10 p.m. and plodded up to bed, leaving me to entertain myself and relax with my computer and the animals. Izzy the cat has taken a liking to me and wants to curl up around my neck while I sit watching T.V. or trying to do something at my laptop and Dafne the Beagle wants to be lying within close proximity so as not to feel left out! I have become so attached to these animals! I think I will miss them almost as much as I will Katie and the kids!

Well, that does it for this week, up till bedtime on Friday night. Tomorrow is a new day with new adventures! We plan on visiting the local Art Museum tomorrow afternoon while Jaden is at a birthday party. I'm eager to see what the day will bring! More Iowa notes to come..........