Well, today I think I have just come as close as I ever will to experiencing the pain a Mom must feel when her baby leaves home. My nephew, Jake, started moving out of my house today. He is moving back with his parents until he can find a place so as to make room for me to move Daddy in. It is so bittersweet.
Jake has always been close to me. He was born in October, 1985 and our first child, Ben, would have been born in July, 1985 had he lived. So, Jake has always held a sort of special place in my heart because he is the age my oldest child would have been. We, well mostly I, talk for hours sometimes. He works the 2nd shift in a quality control lab in a local industry and gets home about midnight. He usually comes in, grabs a snack and sits with me in the living room and we chat for a while until he's ready to settle down and sleep. I will miss those midnight chats!
He is also my fashion advisor, and I his. On Sunday mornings we run from room to room saying "Hey, what do you think about this?" or "Does this match?"!!!! I told him that I fear Papaw Mac won't be as astute a fashion advisor as is he!
Jake moved into our house shortly after we moved out in 2006 and has been here since. When I moved back home earlier this year, I knew he would be moving out at some point, but I have sure gotten accustomed to his presence. I have been so thankful to be back at home that I really haven't done anything to 'move' myself back in except bring my stuff and stay. Now that he's taken his things from the walls and tables, it just looks so bare! I'll have to get busy decorating now or I'll feel like I'm living in a hotel!
Transition used to be so easy for me. I'm not sure if it's that I'm getting older or the fact that I've been through so much transition over the last few years, but it is really hard now. I think this must the kind of blues mothers feel when their children start to leave the nest.
Jake is such an excellent human being and has so many dreams and plans. I love watching him continually growing and changing into the man I know God meant him to be. It was so much fun having him here with me for these few months. It is a time I will treasure for all my days.
I have been privileged, since Terry's death, to live with each of Charlotte and Ricky's children for at least a few weeks and Debra's son lived with us for a couple of years before Terry's accident. Even though we were not blessed to have our children live, we have been blessed to have wonderful relationships with our niece and nephews. And now, the new generation is coming along and they seem to love me as much as I love them! I cannot express with words how blessed I know I am!
And so, life goes on.....isn't it precious to see God working in our lives on a minute-by-minute basis?